Random

Well, I actually realized that I've been soooo stressful for years, making me feel like a gloomy person, and whatever you called it.

I remember the first time I came to Oz I hoped that everything will change.

It turns out they are not. I become more stressful than ever, until I come to a point, when I just wannabe free. Some people said that it might be a bit too late, since I've got my freedom in Oz here, but it's never too late to start changing right?

I'm so afraid to return to be honest. My freedom, which I cherish the most lies here. Even when my mom decided to come early, I was n0t happy at all. I need time to be alone. I know that she means to help me out and stuffs, but I really, really need time to go back alone.

I'm ready to write a happy ending in this chapter though. It just makes me wonder that I wanna do what I wanna do, no matter what people say. I do have other things to fix anyway, like my relationship which is pretty ups and downs ever since I come here - which makes me believe that it takes a lifetime to understand a person and....there's no guarantee that it will reach a happy ending.

I'm doing this as far as what I can do now. Although I have dreams with him, it doesn't mean that I'm gonna sacrifices my other dreams.

It's kinda funny but I wanna go home, and I don't wanna go home at the same time. Maybe I'll accept the offer and stayed in a boarding house alone instead. But I also feel that it's a selfish decision, is it?

*udalah, mendingan jalan jalan dulu gua mumpung di sini*